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Most of us have a hard time describing ourselves in person, let alone in the written form.

Dating after divorce in your 50s

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They may question their upbringing, their very sense of identity, wondering if it were all a lie.

They may feel overwhelmed, especially if they have families of their own. They must never be caught in the middle or made to feel responsible for your own mental well-being. There are always going to be things out of your control, and any attempt on your part to change that will inevitably result in further frustration and unhappiness.

Increased longevity and improvements in healthcare means we may face many more years trapped in an unsatisfying marriage once children have flown the nest and retirement approaches.

Without the buffer of work and family life, underlying problems eventually surface and can no longer be ignored.

If you’d like to hear more from Harriet you can find out more about her here. It’s the one thing you probably never anticipated at this point in life.

No-one walks down the aisle expecting to get divorced 20, 30 or 40 years later.

Looking at these lists side by side will give you a clearer picture of who you are now and where you might be going. Fact – your physical health is the basis for everything else, so don’t ignore it.

And as we get older, we can no longer take our health for granted.

It’s easy to see your past marriage through a negative lens.

It’s easy to end up suppressing certain elements of oneself when in a long-term relationship, even subconsciously. Now you are once more a unit of one, an “I”, and that will take some getting used to! In a list, write out all the things you’d have liked to do whilst married, but couldn’t, or wouldn’t.

Next to that, list all the things you will never, ever do again, now that you’re single after all these years.

Keen to get out there and start again, but finding yourself intimidated or overwhelmed?

“The Fear Ladder” is a popular approach in cognitive behavioral therapy.